Where Were You?

Where Were You?

Where were you when our child was conceived?

Where were you when our child was born? With the umbilical cord wrapped around the neck.

Where were you on our child’s first doctor visit?

Where were you when our child was in the emergency room? All night long.

Where were you when our child lost the first tooth?

Where were you during the doctor visits, the scraped knees,

the tears, the whining and the joy?

Where were you on the birthdays and the  holidays?

Where were you through sicknesses and health issues?

Where were you when our child came home covered in feces

from an accident on the bus?

Where were you when our child was diagnosed “Learning Disabled?

Where were you during the IEP conferences?

Where were you when our child graduated from elementary, high school,

and Computer School?

Where were you when our child began classes at University of Maryland?

Where were you when our child began dating and needed guidance?

Where were you?   I think you were hiding like a child, avoiding responsibilty,

with your head, stuck, where the sun don’t shine.

Me? I was busy, being the mother and the father.

So don’t come at me now that the child is grown,

wondering why the child don’t know you. Just look

in the mirror and ask yourself, “Where were you?”

by Joan Farley Nyobe

About jfarley53

Being 56 is wonderful. I have so many new and jumbled insights on life.
This entry was posted in Children, Family, Love and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Where Were You?

  1. Ravi B. says:

    It pours out the anguish, anger and agony of a single mother. It drills in to the very core of one’s heart. It delivers the message unambiguously.
    Though in the process of conceiving the child he was physically involved yet probably he was totally absent, spiritually.
    How could father possibly turn away from his own child, deserts from the post of duty and derelicts his bonded duty of a father who had coauthored a new life in an act of love? Or was it just a blatant act of sheer lust?
    Yet he has the audacity of come back and shamelessly claim the child when s/he has grown up and perhaps seek legal help to secure it. Or even stoop to leverage his claim with an act of emotional blackmail.
    The mother has every right to pose that prickly question “ Where were you?”
    No one but a single mother can bring out simple and such sensitive emotions.
    By any chance are you a single mother?
    Hats off to you. I salute you.

    • jnyobe48 says:

      Yes, I am a single parent of three children. Three different fathers. Looking for love in all the Wrong places. However, I have no regrets when it comes to my children. What comes in to question is my judgment in choosing a mate. And because of my poor judgment, I have stop dating completely. Celibacy is my new best friend. Thank you for your kind assessment. Best wishes to you.

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